Recently, the American Psychiatric Association actually confirmed that taking selfies is a mental disorder, going as far as to term the condition selfitis. The APA has defined it as: “the obsessive-compulsive desire to take photos of one’s self and post them on social media as a way to make up for the lack of self-esteem and to fill a gap in intimacy”, and has categorized it into three levels: borderline, acute, and chronic.

How extreme is your selfitis? If you find yourself taking up to three selfies a day but not posting them on social media, consider yourself borderline. If you’re posting at least three images of yourself a day, that’s acute. Lastly, if you’re experiencing an uncontrollable urge to take and post up to six photos a day, well then you have chronic selfitis.

It is fair to say that we live in a society that is provoked into an infinite pursuit of superficial perfection that can realistically never be attained. In a world where people are addicted to social media, consumption and plastic surgery, we now live at the verge of insanity, if not well over it. The great danger is that such behaviour feeds directly into our brain’s reward circuit, in the very same manner that other substances do, such as food, sex and drugs. It is then quite obvious that constantly engaging into posting self-images on social media and expecting to receive an istant ‘Like’ reward is no different from hijacking our body’s own natural reward systems, creating never-ending, and more precisely, impossible to satisfy feedback loops. Could you ever delete your social media account? The share prices of the biggest companies in the field certainly indicate that you couldn’t.

As obvious as it may sound, it still remains intriguing that when people think they see themselves, they are always seeing themselves reflected backwards. However, the backward images and person we see in a mirror is profoundly different from what is real. The backwardness distorts not just our features, but the information in our faces and personalities as well. It is therefore no wonder we see ourselves differently than others see us or how we look in photos. Recently, with cameras and video, we can get a sense of what we look like forwards, but it is a static or non-eye to eye view.

Part of the problem is because our faces are asymmetrical. The left and right side of your face may not seem that different but duplicating each side of a face can create strikingly different versions of the same person. This technique is in fact sometimes used by plastic surgeons to emphasise any pre-operative facial asymmetries present, in order to help managing expectations about the outcome of a procedure.

According to the mere-exposure hypothesis, people prefer what they see and encounter most often. In terms of self-perception, this means that people prefer their mirror images to their true images, which are what other people see. Experiments conducted at the University of Wisconsin, Madison in 1977 support this idea: When presented with photos of their true image and their mirror image, participants preferred their mirror image while friends and romantic partners preferred their true image.

First patented in 1887, the idea of a true image mirror is simple; hold two mirrors at exactly 90 degrees and look into the angle. Such mirrors, like the True Mirror^®, present a non-distorted, seamless image – critical for seeing ourselves as we really are.

In many situations we automatically defer to beauty, assuming that along with beauty come all sorts of other positive characteristics. We have a tendency to think beautiful people are funnier, friendlier, more intelligent, more exciting, in possession of better social skills, are sexually warmer, and even more interesting. These sorts of judgements have been tested over-and-over again in the laboratory and elsewhere. This is a great example of the so-called ‘hallo-effect’, when global evaluations about a person spread over into our judgements about their specific traits.

Facial symmetry, considered the trademark of beauty, can be perceived as a sign of health, even if it is not related to actual health. In an Australian study, researchers morphed photographs of young adults so that their faces were perfectly symmetrical. In general, the symmetric version of each face — both male and female — received higher health ratings than the normal image. Individuals with asymmetric faces were perceived as unhealthy.

At work attractive people can receive all kinds of benefits. First of all they may get higher starting salaries, perhaps because their qualifications are perceived as more solid and their potential as greater. Then, later on, they may have an advantage in promotions. In a study of nearly 300 Dutch advertising agencies, it was found that firms with better-looking executives had higher revenues. Overall productivity, and resulting sales, were greater in companies with more attractive managers, partly because firms with more attractive workers have the competitive advantage when client interactions are involved.

Would you ever consider getting a procedure done without telling your partner? If you wouldn’t, you’re not alone! Along with an increase in plastic surgery procedures comes a new type of cheating. More women, and men, are having procedures done and are telling no one about it. Here, we discuss this emerging behaviour in the context of an already established couple relationship.

The statistics on cosmetic surgery generally are very clear. Professional associations record careful data and demonstrate that all kinds of youth-enhancing procedures are on the rise. What is less clear is how many patients are hiding their surgeries from everyone in their lives. Anecdotal evidence and small surveys show that this number is also rising. Evidence shows that one-third of patients are opting to hide their surgeries from other people, including their partner.

One could reasonably argue that this practice represents a new kind of infidelity. The cheating begins with money. Many patients report that they don’t want their partners to know how much money they are spending on elective surgeries. They worry that their spouses won’t approve, so they use cash or a combination of credit cards and cash to hide the total amount. Or, they spread the expense out over several credit cards to fool a spouse.

Aside from the financial issue, it’s difficult to gauge why people would want to hide their surgical procedures. Some may be afraid of disapproval, aside from the cost. Women are more sensitive to appearance as they age and many men fail to understand the importance of looking youthful. Some women may think that plastic surgery will prevent their spouse from cheating, but want to keep the details of maintaining youthfulness a secret.

So how do people hide surgeries from an intimate partner? Some wait for their partners to travel for work, e.g. a long business trip. A big procedure requires time from which to recover, and travel can be the perfect way for a woman to get her work done, recover and have her husband be none the wiser. Others only go so far as to hide minor procedures, such as Botox injections or minor liposuction. Many women report that their husbands fail to notice small changes.

Is secret plastic surgery then cheating? Not in the traditional sense, but many people would feel that it is wrong to keep such an important secret. Changing your appearance without informing your partner is indeed a big deal. Small secrets in a relationship are normal, but hiding surgical procedures is certainly not. If one chooses to go down this path, it would be wise to first carefully consider all implications, in the event that the truth does come out in the end.

Of course, the idea of using plastic surgery as a means to secretly change ones’ looks is not limited to the context of a mature partnership or relationship. It is well encountered among younger people that seek new partners or generally aspire to changing how others in the society perceive them, based on their external appearance. In this context, ‘cheating’ with cosmetic surgery may even be more hotly debated, partly due to the fact that new friendships and relationships are built on secrets. However, as the taboos surrounding plastic surgical gradually fade away in our society, so do the stigmas associated with it. It is then not unimaginable to think that a time will come when having cosmetic procedures will be considered and accepted as fully normal behaviour. And that openly talking about it will not only be unimportant or trivial, but also boring. This would surely enhance the grey nature of the debate, in case there is still one around.